BATTERY LOW

Considering my untraditional work situation, not having a car charger for my cellphone can be a problem. It´s happened a couple of times now. I am rushing out the door going through a mental checklist—interpreter badge, water bottle, keys, sweater, cellphone, etc.  And then the screen of my phone flashes...BATTERY LOW. POWERING OFF.

I freeze for a moment, daunted by the inconvenience of not having a cellphone for the day or having to search for a handy electrical outlet between assignments. I throw my powerless phone in my bag and head off reprimanding myself for not making sure it was charged.

Being without a charged cellphone on a work day unsettles me. Yet, how often do we dive into the day without our spiritual battery, which connects us to God, charged?

Is God trying to tell me something? Is God hoping I´ll revisit the importance of spending quiet time in His power-filled presence?

I sit on the floor of my room reluctant to move from that spot until God´s purpose is accomplished. Selfish motives melt under His gaze. Fresh mercy, love, conviction, and truth turn my weakness into strength.  But the power I am receiving is not some generic, impersonal, unchanging river of electricity. No, this recharging experience is like one of those long conversations that neither person wants to end. It changes everything, just like a warm embrace from a friend who understands.

The end result (being fully charged) is important, but the time-requiring process (of making the connection and becoming charged) is irreplaceable. It´s time spent with the Divine heart that restores what I completely lack: stronger faith, compassion for others, humility, an attitude of gratitude, and familiarity with One who longs to guide me. This is what will keep me going. Only with this power will I stand up when everyone else sits down. Only by lingering near the Source of strength do I have any chance of being carried through the storm. Yes, some things are infinitely more vital than having a fully charged cellphone. Things like an early morning encounter with Truth that gives meaning to my smiles and even to my tears.

Vegan Cranberry Lemon Scones

     
     Well it's been a while since I posted last but now that school is out for the summer I should be able to provide more consistent thoughts and recipes for you all!
      The birth of this next recipe was again a result of my drive to complete a personal challenge: make an authentic tasting, flaky, English tea worthy, completely vegan scone. One of my favorite memories as a child is staying at the Historic Benbow Inn in Humboldt County, California and waiting with anticipation for the daily complimentary tea and scones served in the lobby every afternoon at 3 o'clock. Something about biting into a flaky cranberry/orange scone and sitting in a high backed chair made me feel so elegant and indulgent. Of course the only thing that would have made those scones more psychologically enjoyable for me is if they were vegan. Over the years I have tried unsuccessfully to create a vegan scone worthy of being served at the Benbow Inn and conjuring similar memories of elegance. This past year while living in Loma Linda, California a friend made some scones that I instantly fell in love with and which planted the reoccurring thought in my mind "If only I could make this scone vegan!" Thus I happily took up the challenge again.
       The most difficult ingredient to replace in scones is a nice heavy cream which provides most of the fat and seems to give a scone all its landmark characteristics so, I started experimenting with that first. After going through several alternatives and coming up with a satisfactory one I tried it in the following scone recipe and waited impatiently for the finished product to come out of the oven. They smelled delicious but what about taste? I gingerly picked one up, surveyed it with a critical eye, then tentatively went in for the bite. Prepared to be only somewhat satisfied, imagine my joy when the scone crunched, crumbled, and melted in my mouth just as it should.....success!! Fireworks went off in my head....I hope you have the same experience upon trying this recipe. Let me know what you think and comment on any changes you may have made to the recipe for our mutual enjoyment!


HEAVY VEGAN CREAM

Combine in a blender:
- 3/4 cup vanilla (or unsweetened) soy milk
- 1 Tbsp. lemon juice
Blend for 1 1/2 minutes on high and set aside.

Combine  in a small bowl and mix well:
- 1 cup of sunflower oil (or vegetable oil) 
- 1/2 tsp. vanilla extract 
- 1 Tbsp. maple syrup
Add this mixture very slowly, in one thin stream, to the soy milk mixture while still blending on high. Keep blending until mixture gets fairly thick (which usually happens as the last of the oil mixture is being poured into the blender). Refrigerate cream and use as needed. It keeps for about a week.

Note: Other heavy cream replacements include coconut milk or a combination of soymilk and coconut milk simmered down but the replacement that has had the most pleasing results is the above recipe.

Once the cream is done you can move on to the scones.


VEGAN CRANBERRY/LEMON SCONES

2 Cup unbleached flour
1 Tbsp. baking powder
3 Tbsp. sugar
1/2 tsp. salt
5 Tbsp. chilled margarine (preferably non-hydrogenated such as Smart Balance)
1/2 Cup of dried cranberries or currants (chocolate chips can also be used)
1-2 tsp. lemon rind, freshly grated
1 Cup heavy vegan cream

Whisk together flour, baking powder, sugar, and salt. Cut margarine into the dry mixture until the mixture resembles course crumbs. You can use a fork or knife to cut in the margarine but I prefer to wash my hands and use them to incorporate the margarine instead! :D Next, stir in the dried cranberries until they are nicely coated with a layer of the flour/margarine mixture. Last comes the heavy vegan cream. Stir in the cream with a spatula for no more than 30 seconds. It is preferable to not handle scone dough too much as it may not rise sufficiently or may become tough. Knead the dough in the bowl for 5-10 seconds and form it into a rough sticky ball. Lightly press the dough into a 8 or 9-inch round pan and turn onto a floured surface. With a knife (preferably not serrated) cut out the scones into the shape/size you desire and place on a oiled cookie sheet (I made 6-8 large scones from this recipe).
Optional: sprinkle some cane sugar over the scones for a decorative finish.
Bake scones at 425 F for 12-15 minutes. The larger your scones, the longer you will need to bake them. The bottom of the scone should turn a nice golden brown when done.

Now, take a scone, a cup of your favorite tea, settle in your favorite chair, and take a moment to feel elegant and indulgent......

 
 

Feeling the Absence

She said she was going to miss us.

“Especially you and your family,” she added seriously. “You don´t know how much.”

I didn´t get it. Her admissions left me slightly confused and amused. She was going away for less than three months. Great learning experiences awaited her in new, interesting places. I couldn´t quite understand her degree of melancholy. Sure, I was going to miss her too, but no need to be overly sentimental about it.

A week and five days have passed. I´ve had to jump in the river, eat at a Japanese restaurant, attend Thursday night Bible study, watch Pride and Prejudice, scramble over giant fallen redwoods, and throw an Aerobie Frisbee for it to finally hit me—I don´t just miss my friend, I truly miss her. It could be said I miss her company, her craziness, her laugh, her phone calls, her multi-faceted support…but that would be a small percentage of the entire truth. My missing of her sinks deep into that region of my heart where words fail. It´s now my turn to feel sentimental.

If I had to describe what is missing, I´d say I miss the bond we share when she´s part of my days. There´s something different about life´s experience when you have someone next to you who knows you well and chooses to love you as you are, and who has likewise let themself be known and loved by you. There´s underlying comfort in being near one who won´t too quickly misinterpret your silences and gracefully looks past your everyday mistakes. That person is safer and more confident with you nearby, and you are likewise less afraid and more at ease when they are present.                  

A bond like this is rare and precious. I think, perhaps, I´ve begun to taste the emotion that my best friend was trying to express. I am recognizing that her pre-trip sentimentality was rather insightful.

My mind turns to another Friend who deeply cherishes authentic bonds with us. One who knows all, and yet still longs to be known; who sees into billions of souls, but still values individual beauty and glimpses beyond unsightly personal flaws. One who considers separation from us emotionally wrenching. One who draws courage from a single open conversation.  One who, though invisible, is not far from any one of us.

When you choose a divergent path, the growing distance breaks His heart. He misses you. You can´t imagine how much.

Lifetime Romance

My friend Claudia happened to hear a couple of songs I had saved on my laptop. She turned to me and asked with slight incredulity, “So…you´re a romantic?”

I had to laugh and replied, “Isn´t everyone?”

Although it was just a quick response, I realized that I actually believe we were all meant to be romantics. While due to sin, confusion, societal misconceptions, and hurt, some eyes no longer see the beauty in a pure love story, or pretend not to, we were made to recognize and admire true, unselfish love. Mutual devotion and willing commitment between two people are a testimony to grace. God Himself invented romance and even calls His chosen people “His betrothed” and “His bride.” There is a romantic gleam in all of our hearts, small or flickering though it may be. Even as real life examples of God-inspired romance may be few and far between, our minds will continue to guard an image, an ideal of romance that goes beyond sentimentalism, fairytale endings, and red roses.

Thus, as one of countless romantics, my heart naturally feels joyous as we look forward to September 2, 2013. A huge moment in the life of my brother Nathan and my soon-to-be sister Eurides. Anticipation grows. An excitement is noted in our conversations. But a wedding cannot be considered the high point, or epitome, of lovely romance. The moment of “I do” is but the symbolically-rich prelude to a symphony for which they have been preparing even before ever meeting. The walk down the aisle represents the first steps of a romance that I pray and believe will last forever.

I love you Nath and Eurides…and if you can´t tell, I´m super excited!

Check out their story and pics…Eurides&Nathan Wedding Website

I Crumble Sometimes

 

I crumble sometimes

Like a leaf taken with age,

Sucked of all moist life

By a hot, dust-filled wind.

 

Disconnected from my roots,

My petals fly away

A few at a time…

And I feel as if

I have just been born

Although I have just died.

 

I crumble sometimes

Like paper with lost meaning,

Robbed of all pride

In the sudden turns of slow centuries.

 

Torn from my cover,

My edges disintegrate first

For having been caressed most…

And I feel as if

My soul is being discovered

Although my sentences are disappearing. 

 

I crumble sometimes

Like a monument absently forgotten,

My future and past weathered away

By blind storms and shut eyes.

 

Left to testify alone,

My memories find no purpose

In sleeping bound to fading granite…

And I feel as if

An embrace has found me

Although no hand pauses to touch my collapse.

 

I crumble sometimes

Not because the moments are without hope,

But because I am tired of configuration.

 

As I break apart

All of me…each of me

Seeks for a new life.

Everywhere.

Out on a bike ride. A stop at my usual hill where I go to think about God and pray.

I ask God how it is that the sun's light on my skin and the wind brushing my cheek...
the pouring rain of the day before and the sound of happy birds...
the kind half-smile of a stranger and the unsolicited, warm embrace from my 1-year-old neice...
are all equally touches of His grace, and expressions of His love.  

He says, "Because I am love, and love is limitless."

Writing to Remember

(Thoughts on my mind after the Sabbath service presented by our young adult Bible study group - This Generation for Christ - on April 27, 2013)

Something must be written.

“Why?” some part of me asks, “You have a school assignment to finish.”

“Why must it be written? When words capture so little of the depth, so few of the emotions? Why must it? Who will care?”

The answer comes. It´s one I´ve heard before. The simple answer is that I use words to hold on, to hold on to pieces of my life. It´s impossible to hold on to everything, but I capture snatches, remnants of what my heart has felt, what I have seen, understood, touched, and tasted. I want to remember in five years, or thirty years. I want to re-glimpse a moment through my 25-year-old eyes. Through these honest words I want to hold on to a few things that possibly won´t survive in my memory otherwise.

For this reason something must be written…about this exhilaration, this gratitude.

I saw their faces come through the rear doors of the church. As I began playing the piano, I sensed them, more than saw them, filling the front two pews. The room held a rare energy. I felt a heart-deep smile spread across my face, my soul relaxed. Things would be fine. My friends were here.

Minutes later, I glanced around at the five young people who were on the panel discussion with me. Sincere eyes, sincere voices responding. Hints of nervousness pushed aside by the familiarity of sitting next to friends and being ourselves. At that moment, I knew I was blessed. Blessed to be one of “them,” one of the group.

Attentive expressions in the audience. A friend and sister audibly supporting via video clip. The ready presence of a friend standing next to me. Complete confidence that we would both say the right thing. My own voice reading the affirming words of the Most High God. The knowledge that our best had been done. Young voices singing an old hymn of renewed devotion.

The experience is still sinking in. The unity felt on that platform drifted into a hike, a spontaneous invitation in the church parking lot, earnest evening sharing, and a unique fullness of joy. What else must God have in store for us?