Sleepy eyes. Time to get up. Unmotivated.
I don´t want to think about the school and work
assignments that await me.
The horizon is just beginning to turn light. My
window frames a piece of the changing sky. In my drowsiness a wave of nostalgia
hits me—I guess if I´m honest I actually must say a wave of sadness.
I miss Him. The clouds have still not rolled back
as a scroll. His glory has not yet broken through the atmosphere, making
everything right again. Another morning without seeing His face. It´s almost
too much to bear at 5:50 a.m.
I imagine the framed piece of the sky being a door
to heaven. Maybe if I stare at it long enough. Maybe if I relentlessly look up
it will swing open and I will see the joyous and tearful face of my God rushing
to let me feel His arms for the first time.
But I am still on this side of the door…and He on
the other. Could it be He is more anxious than I, with His scarred hand
expectantly hovering near the door handle? Heart beating fast? Longing to end
His millennia of loneliness…waiting to fling aside the separation and take away
earth´s pain forever.
A lonely yet lovely tune reaches my ears. I´m not
imagining it. The bird sings on and I know it is God´s chosen musician. Dawning
realization is that, despite everything, this morning has been anointed by
Love—my feeble love for Him and His aching Love for me. All becomes bearable…because I have heard the
Love song.
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